Good Morning Cancer Patients and Caregivers:
As you probably already know, reconciling the medical expenses for cancer treatment with your health insurance company is time consuming, frustrating and just plain annoying. Why should anything be so complicated and difficult. The reconciliation effort to determine what expenses you are responsible for after the insurance coverage has been applied is a major undertaking when you are in treatment. In fact, it is equally a major undertaking when you are not in treatment and incurring medical expenses.
Based on our experience working through the maze of charges, deductibles, insurance pay and discounted charges for care, is on set of documentation and record keeping. Not to mention the enormous inaccuracies and errors in charges for medical care reported by the hospital, doctors' offices and any other medical care provider all demanding payment. Meanwhile, you are not necessarily up to your best while going through treatment or recovering from surgery or having other medical procedures being performed.
The process we developed to deal with the maze was a result of necessity. First do not pay the first invoice from the hospital or any medical provider. They have submitted their invoices for payment to the insurance company and are expecting you to cover the remaining cost. We found that if you wait, the insurance company sends you a notice of medical payment and the amount they will cover. You then verify the insurance covered procedures and expenses with the medical providers expenses to determine if they match. If they do not match, you contact the insurance company and medical provider regarding the discrepancies.
We always found numerous errors in the medical providers' expenses for procedures that were not performed and for days we were not at the medical provider. We also found there were expenses that the insurance should and would cover but because they were incorrectly coded by the medical provider, they were not covered by insurance. Numerous other errors and inaccuracies were discovered by comparing the expenses, verifying procedures and dates of service as well as challenging the coding. Many times the insurance company and the medical providers worked the discrepancies out between them and the final expenses we were responsible for were greatly reduced or eliminated.
To get organized, keep a calendar of your medical appointments for treatment and any medical procedures you have. Keep a binder or file to organize the invoices by the insurance carrier and the medical provider by date of service. Review and compare the charges and procedures for accuracy and validate they were performed. Document any discrepancies and contact the company making the error. Document the name of the person, date and phone number of the company representative you spoke with regarding the discrepancy. Make no payment for expenses until the discrepancies are reconciled to your satisfaction and the errors are corrected.
It shouldn't be this tough but the medical payment system and business processes are perfectly designed to make it this tough. So, be patient, don't get frustrated, don't pay the first invoice and be relentless in your efforts to make the provider and the insurance company get it right.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and never give up.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Thursday, November 7, 2013
Know the Choices You Can Make
Good Morning Cancer Patients and Caregivers;
As with many journeys, the cancer treatment and recovery journey is filled with numerous choices to be made. Many will be made by your cancer treatment team, Oncologist, surgeon and others. While many will be made by you. Your Oncologist and treatment team will decide the protocol they will use to treat you. The surgeon will decide the procedure to use if surgery is required. If you use a Dietitian, they will decide your nutritional regime. Your Radiologist will decide the radiology treatment protocol. All along the course of the journey, choices are made regarding your treatment. Most cancer patients don't realize they can be a part of the decision process by participating, asking the questions: why? and, what alternative choices do I have?
When I was diagnosed, I could be treated with chemo and radiation, then go through surgery or I could go through surgery and then start chemo and go through radiation. If I had not asked the question about the alternatives I would have never known there were alternatives. When my tear ducts closed from the chemo and my eyes watered because they couldn't drain through the ducts, the eye specialist decided to insert glass tubes into the tear ducts to keep them open. I asked him what were my alternatives. He responded, do nothing, or come in here every week and I will flush the ducts and you will use a steroid eye drop which wouldn't resolve the issue, just make it more tolerable. I chose to have my eyes flushed every week and to use the drops. A week after I finished my last round of a week's worth of chemo treatment, my tear ducts opened and were back to normal.
There were numerous other occasions where I made choices including: deciding on a surgeon based on the procedure he was going to use and his past experience with it, versus using the surgeon the Oncologist referred me to that was going to use a different procedure and was rather nonchalant during our meeting to discuss the surgery; deciding to keep my infusion port in until I was finally released from the Oncologist five years after I was diagnosed, and had my port flushed every three months; requesting to have a CT scan done every three months rather than every six months because I wanted to shorten the time from when the cancer returned to when we identified it and started a treatment; deciding I was going to continue living my live while going through treatment and continue doing the things I was doing when I was diagnosed ( working, water sking, riding motor cycles, lifting weights).
Don't let the diagnosis of cancer and the treatment process keep you from knowing what your choices are and the decisions you can make . Your oncologist and cancer treatment team will share any information and choices that will be made. You need to participate and have them know, you want to know your choices and the consequences of the choices you can make. By doing so will help reduce the fear factor, give you a sense of controlling your destiny, and allow you to feel like treatment is being done with you, and not being done to you.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and never give up.
As with many journeys, the cancer treatment and recovery journey is filled with numerous choices to be made. Many will be made by your cancer treatment team, Oncologist, surgeon and others. While many will be made by you. Your Oncologist and treatment team will decide the protocol they will use to treat you. The surgeon will decide the procedure to use if surgery is required. If you use a Dietitian, they will decide your nutritional regime. Your Radiologist will decide the radiology treatment protocol. All along the course of the journey, choices are made regarding your treatment. Most cancer patients don't realize they can be a part of the decision process by participating, asking the questions: why? and, what alternative choices do I have?
When I was diagnosed, I could be treated with chemo and radiation, then go through surgery or I could go through surgery and then start chemo and go through radiation. If I had not asked the question about the alternatives I would have never known there were alternatives. When my tear ducts closed from the chemo and my eyes watered because they couldn't drain through the ducts, the eye specialist decided to insert glass tubes into the tear ducts to keep them open. I asked him what were my alternatives. He responded, do nothing, or come in here every week and I will flush the ducts and you will use a steroid eye drop which wouldn't resolve the issue, just make it more tolerable. I chose to have my eyes flushed every week and to use the drops. A week after I finished my last round of a week's worth of chemo treatment, my tear ducts opened and were back to normal.
There were numerous other occasions where I made choices including: deciding on a surgeon based on the procedure he was going to use and his past experience with it, versus using the surgeon the Oncologist referred me to that was going to use a different procedure and was rather nonchalant during our meeting to discuss the surgery; deciding to keep my infusion port in until I was finally released from the Oncologist five years after I was diagnosed, and had my port flushed every three months; requesting to have a CT scan done every three months rather than every six months because I wanted to shorten the time from when the cancer returned to when we identified it and started a treatment; deciding I was going to continue living my live while going through treatment and continue doing the things I was doing when I was diagnosed ( working, water sking, riding motor cycles, lifting weights).
Don't let the diagnosis of cancer and the treatment process keep you from knowing what your choices are and the decisions you can make . Your oncologist and cancer treatment team will share any information and choices that will be made. You need to participate and have them know, you want to know your choices and the consequences of the choices you can make. By doing so will help reduce the fear factor, give you a sense of controlling your destiny, and allow you to feel like treatment is being done with you, and not being done to you.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and never give up.
Monday, October 21, 2013
Find What Works for You
Good Morning Cancer Patients and Caregivers;
Undergoing cancer treatment is a trying experience by any stretch of the imagination. Only another cancer patient knows the trials, tribulations, degree of discomfort and down right physical torture you will need to endure during treatment. Modern medical science has a wealth of drugs to assist you to endure the treatment and its side effects but I have always said medicine is not an exact science and many times you will either have to just endure or be proactive and find what works for you.
For example, when I finished radiation treatment for esophageal cancer, the inside of my throat was so soar from radiation I was not able to swallow most foods. My Oncologist had directed me to go on a liquid diet or to eat foods that were soft, to allow my throat to heal for the next two weeks. I responded I wasn't going to be able to eat ice cream for the next two weeks. His response was I was going to have to figure it out. So, Linda and I set out to find what works besides ice cream. First we made a list of every known soft food we could think of, from Ramen noodle soup to scrambled eggs. The list was longer than we thought it would be and included the protein and good calories I needed to keep my weight and strength up. The list included:
poached eggs, hot cereals, milk, tea, jello, puddings, mashed potatoes, tuna salad, ham salad, egg salad, soft meats in cream sauces or in thick meat sauces. Thick meat gravy on bread and bread and butter became staples. Soda and beer burned and foods with rougher textures scratched my throat. The temperature of the foods could not be hot, but warm to cold . The colder the foods the better they seemed to sooth. Every day the healing process got a little better until my throat was fully healed and I could return to my normal diet.
This is just one example where we needed to find what works. There were more occasions such as finding what foods I would not eat during treatment days in order to keep the effect of being sick to my stomach to a minimum. Lighter foods always did better than foods with tomato base or with higher fat count. Spicy foods were out, on days of treatment but I didn't mind because for the most part, I couldn't taste anything anyway. Finding what works was the result of the medical profession and the cancer team not having the answers to the day-to-day issues I faced while in treatment. Since they hadn't ever sat in the infusion chair, my expectation of them knowing what to do once I left the infusion chair on treatments days was too high.
There are numerous other times during my treatment process, surgery and recovery that I had to find what works. I encourage every cancer patient and caregiver not to get discouraged. You just have to figure it out as a member of your treatment team and share what works for you with other cancer patients and your treatment team so they can share your findings with other patients.
When there aren't any answers, you can decide to suffer through it or you can find what works for you. Just the effort alone, to find what works for you, will take your mind off of it for a while and when you have found something that works for you it will be a small accomplishment that gives you assurance you are not losing.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and never ever give up.
Undergoing cancer treatment is a trying experience by any stretch of the imagination. Only another cancer patient knows the trials, tribulations, degree of discomfort and down right physical torture you will need to endure during treatment. Modern medical science has a wealth of drugs to assist you to endure the treatment and its side effects but I have always said medicine is not an exact science and many times you will either have to just endure or be proactive and find what works for you.
For example, when I finished radiation treatment for esophageal cancer, the inside of my throat was so soar from radiation I was not able to swallow most foods. My Oncologist had directed me to go on a liquid diet or to eat foods that were soft, to allow my throat to heal for the next two weeks. I responded I wasn't going to be able to eat ice cream for the next two weeks. His response was I was going to have to figure it out. So, Linda and I set out to find what works besides ice cream. First we made a list of every known soft food we could think of, from Ramen noodle soup to scrambled eggs. The list was longer than we thought it would be and included the protein and good calories I needed to keep my weight and strength up. The list included:
poached eggs, hot cereals, milk, tea, jello, puddings, mashed potatoes, tuna salad, ham salad, egg salad, soft meats in cream sauces or in thick meat sauces. Thick meat gravy on bread and bread and butter became staples. Soda and beer burned and foods with rougher textures scratched my throat. The temperature of the foods could not be hot, but warm to cold . The colder the foods the better they seemed to sooth. Every day the healing process got a little better until my throat was fully healed and I could return to my normal diet.
This is just one example where we needed to find what works. There were more occasions such as finding what foods I would not eat during treatment days in order to keep the effect of being sick to my stomach to a minimum. Lighter foods always did better than foods with tomato base or with higher fat count. Spicy foods were out, on days of treatment but I didn't mind because for the most part, I couldn't taste anything anyway. Finding what works was the result of the medical profession and the cancer team not having the answers to the day-to-day issues I faced while in treatment. Since they hadn't ever sat in the infusion chair, my expectation of them knowing what to do once I left the infusion chair on treatments days was too high.
There are numerous other times during my treatment process, surgery and recovery that I had to find what works. I encourage every cancer patient and caregiver not to get discouraged. You just have to figure it out as a member of your treatment team and share what works for you with other cancer patients and your treatment team so they can share your findings with other patients.
When there aren't any answers, you can decide to suffer through it or you can find what works for you. Just the effort alone, to find what works for you, will take your mind off of it for a while and when you have found something that works for you it will be a small accomplishment that gives you assurance you are not losing.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and never ever give up.
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Dealing with the Pain from Treatment
Good Morning Cancer Patients and Caregivers;
The physical pain caused by cancer treatment can be unbelievable. As treatment progresses, the pain from chemo treatment or the radiation treatments will increase as well. How you deal with the pain is your choice. Your Oncologist will ask you how you are feeling. You need to explain the pain you are experiencing. Pain suppressant medication can be prescribed to help you deal with the pain.
During my treatment of chemo I found the pain to progress as treatment progressed. The pain seemed to be compounding, getting stronger and more encompassing over my body. What started as the aches and pains like that from a bought with the flu, progressed to the point I could not sleep at night because I physically ached all over. The pain would wake me up and it would keep me up the rest of the night. There were times I would just lay in bed and try not to move. As soon as I moved the pain would strike, reoccur and stay with me.
I used aspirin during the day for as long as I could but would then have to resort to prescribed medication in the evening, otherwise I would not be able to sleep. The pain from radiation treatment was more concentrated to the area being treated. The pain was both external as well as internal. My chest was red and burned and the inside of my throat raw from radiation. Eating and swallowing food caused sever pain in my throat. Prescribed cream helped deal with the burn on my chest.
As my chemo treatment continued, I learned to deal with the pain during the day by staying busy, which distracted my attention away from the pain. Although I found the bottoms of my feet never hurt so bad as they did when I was in chemo treatment.Staying busy took my mind off the pain. It didn't make the pain go away, it just distracted me from dwelling on it. Evenings after dinner were difficult. I would notice the pain as I watched TV or went to bed and tried to fall asleep.
One activity I found that did help keep the pain level down was exercise, any physical exercise: walking, swimming, weight lifting, mowing the lawn, all made the pain level subside or at least made the pain more tolerable. I also found that having a few cold beers at the end of the day helped as well.
The diagnosis of cancer and the rigor of cancer treatment, create enough emotional pain to deal with, without having to endure the strong physical pain that accompanies you on your treatment journey. Learning to deal with the pain is an acquired skill. You will need find what works for you and be proactive in managing and dealing with the pain. I encourage you to be as active as your physical strength and stamina will allow. The activity whether mental or physical, creates enough distraction that you will not be able to dwell on the pain. I found as soon as I became inactive, the pain level settled in and I couldn't make it subside without the help of medication. Enduring physical pain will drain you of the energy and strength you need for treatment and recovery. Don't let the physical pain from cancer treatment make you a victim.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and never give up.
The physical pain caused by cancer treatment can be unbelievable. As treatment progresses, the pain from chemo treatment or the radiation treatments will increase as well. How you deal with the pain is your choice. Your Oncologist will ask you how you are feeling. You need to explain the pain you are experiencing. Pain suppressant medication can be prescribed to help you deal with the pain.
During my treatment of chemo I found the pain to progress as treatment progressed. The pain seemed to be compounding, getting stronger and more encompassing over my body. What started as the aches and pains like that from a bought with the flu, progressed to the point I could not sleep at night because I physically ached all over. The pain would wake me up and it would keep me up the rest of the night. There were times I would just lay in bed and try not to move. As soon as I moved the pain would strike, reoccur and stay with me.
I used aspirin during the day for as long as I could but would then have to resort to prescribed medication in the evening, otherwise I would not be able to sleep. The pain from radiation treatment was more concentrated to the area being treated. The pain was both external as well as internal. My chest was red and burned and the inside of my throat raw from radiation. Eating and swallowing food caused sever pain in my throat. Prescribed cream helped deal with the burn on my chest.
As my chemo treatment continued, I learned to deal with the pain during the day by staying busy, which distracted my attention away from the pain. Although I found the bottoms of my feet never hurt so bad as they did when I was in chemo treatment.Staying busy took my mind off the pain. It didn't make the pain go away, it just distracted me from dwelling on it. Evenings after dinner were difficult. I would notice the pain as I watched TV or went to bed and tried to fall asleep.
One activity I found that did help keep the pain level down was exercise, any physical exercise: walking, swimming, weight lifting, mowing the lawn, all made the pain level subside or at least made the pain more tolerable. I also found that having a few cold beers at the end of the day helped as well.
The diagnosis of cancer and the rigor of cancer treatment, create enough emotional pain to deal with, without having to endure the strong physical pain that accompanies you on your treatment journey. Learning to deal with the pain is an acquired skill. You will need find what works for you and be proactive in managing and dealing with the pain. I encourage you to be as active as your physical strength and stamina will allow. The activity whether mental or physical, creates enough distraction that you will not be able to dwell on the pain. I found as soon as I became inactive, the pain level settled in and I couldn't make it subside without the help of medication. Enduring physical pain will drain you of the energy and strength you need for treatment and recovery. Don't let the physical pain from cancer treatment make you a victim.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and never give up.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Make It Work
Good Morning Cancer Patients and Caregivers;
More cancer patients today are surviving cancer than ever before and more people are living with cancer than ever before. When you are diagnosed with cancer and before you have gotten through the shock of the diagnosis, your cancer treatment team will have already begun to do everything possible to cure your cancer. The question is: What are you going to do now to help your cancer treatment team win this battle you are in?
This is the worst battle of your life and for your life. Cancer is a relentless enemy that works on your body 24/7 with no time off for holidays and vacation. Relying solely on your cancer treatment team to fight this battle with cancer for you, is nothing more than a good intention, and hoping they don't lose. The cancer patient can chose the be a victim and a specimen and have treatment done to them. Or the cancer patient can decide to help make the treatment work.
Chemo treatment is a high stakes poker game where your oncologist and cancer treatment team are trying to kill your cancer before the treatment kills you. Your body will take the worst chemical abuse it has ever endured with chemo and radiation treatment. You can't sit on the side line. You have to help your body endure the treatment, stay healthy during treatment,and stay as strong as possible.
This sounds easier than it is to execute. I was there.But while I was sitting in an infusion chair five days a week for five hours a day, I couldn't help thinking: What should I be doing to help with the treatment? Over the course of my treatment being challenged by this thought, I concluded there were three Must Get Rights. First: Join the Journey. Learn everything about your cancer, treatment protocol being used, the success rate with the protocol, understanding your blood work results and CT and PET scan results. Second: Feed the System. A tired and undernourished soldier can't fight a long battle. Feed your body much higher nutrition especially high antioxidant and protein content foods. Physically exercise to keep your system and body functioning. The data shows that cancer patients that exercise regularly while undergoing treatment have better treatment success. Feed the system mentally by not dwelling on the fact you have cancer and are in treatment. Stay as active as you are physically able. Activity keeps your mind off the cancer and the pain it may be causing you. Third: Decide to Live. Don't let cancer and the treatment strip you of your life. You are not sick, you just have cancer. So, keep living your life.
Most importantly, find what works for you. You will have to figure out what you can and cannot do. What you should do and shouldn't. The more you Make It Work, the greater control you will have over your own destiny and treatment outcome. Being diagnosed with cancer is like being thrown out of a perfectly good air plane with a parachute that's a streamer and won't open. As the ground is rushing up to you, You Now Have the Rest of Your Life to Make It Work.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor, make it work, and never ever give up.
More cancer patients today are surviving cancer than ever before and more people are living with cancer than ever before. When you are diagnosed with cancer and before you have gotten through the shock of the diagnosis, your cancer treatment team will have already begun to do everything possible to cure your cancer. The question is: What are you going to do now to help your cancer treatment team win this battle you are in?
This is the worst battle of your life and for your life. Cancer is a relentless enemy that works on your body 24/7 with no time off for holidays and vacation. Relying solely on your cancer treatment team to fight this battle with cancer for you, is nothing more than a good intention, and hoping they don't lose. The cancer patient can chose the be a victim and a specimen and have treatment done to them. Or the cancer patient can decide to help make the treatment work.
Chemo treatment is a high stakes poker game where your oncologist and cancer treatment team are trying to kill your cancer before the treatment kills you. Your body will take the worst chemical abuse it has ever endured with chemo and radiation treatment. You can't sit on the side line. You have to help your body endure the treatment, stay healthy during treatment,and stay as strong as possible.
This sounds easier than it is to execute. I was there.But while I was sitting in an infusion chair five days a week for five hours a day, I couldn't help thinking: What should I be doing to help with the treatment? Over the course of my treatment being challenged by this thought, I concluded there were three Must Get Rights. First: Join the Journey. Learn everything about your cancer, treatment protocol being used, the success rate with the protocol, understanding your blood work results and CT and PET scan results. Second: Feed the System. A tired and undernourished soldier can't fight a long battle. Feed your body much higher nutrition especially high antioxidant and protein content foods. Physically exercise to keep your system and body functioning. The data shows that cancer patients that exercise regularly while undergoing treatment have better treatment success. Feed the system mentally by not dwelling on the fact you have cancer and are in treatment. Stay as active as you are physically able. Activity keeps your mind off the cancer and the pain it may be causing you. Third: Decide to Live. Don't let cancer and the treatment strip you of your life. You are not sick, you just have cancer. So, keep living your life.
Most importantly, find what works for you. You will have to figure out what you can and cannot do. What you should do and shouldn't. The more you Make It Work, the greater control you will have over your own destiny and treatment outcome. Being diagnosed with cancer is like being thrown out of a perfectly good air plane with a parachute that's a streamer and won't open. As the ground is rushing up to you, You Now Have the Rest of Your Life to Make It Work.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor, make it work, and never ever give up.
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Knowing When It Is Time to Stop
Good Morning Cancer Patients and Caregivers;
At a presentation I was giving to a cancer support group I was asked the question: "How do you know when it's time to stop?" The person who asked the question, informed me they had been battling cancer off and on for over 11 years now because it came back 3 times. I asked if it came back again would they be willing to battle it again? They responded, "at this time, yes".
I don't know the right answer to this question. My treatment lasted for 3 months, 5 days a week for 4-5 hours in an infusion chair every 4 weeks for 2 months; another month of carrying an infusion pack 5 days a week with 24 hour infusion and 25 days of radiation; recovery for 6 weeks; surgery; recovery from surgery; and 6 more rounds of 5 days a week 4-5 hours a day every 4 weeks for 6 months. That was my treatment protocol. I haven't been faced with the decision to make about when it is time to stop. I know when I completed my 6th round of treatment, I wasn't in any condition to be able to continue treatment if needed. My body told me it had enough. Although, after the 4th round of the 6 round regimen of treatment, I was asked by my oncologist if I was able to continue treatment. My body wasn't telling me it needed a rest or that it couldn't continue. My response was "I will tell you when to stop". It took me 18 months after treatment before I could say I felt good again. During the 18 months of recovering, I was asked if I would go through treatment again if it came back. I responded, I didn't feel like I wanted to but yes, I would go through treatment again.
Every cancer patient decides how they will conduct their personal battle with cancer. I believe if you listen to your body, your body will tell you when it's time to stop. This is the time when the mind, which may be willing, needs to yield to the body. Regardless of your personal strength, stamina and courage, there may come the time when enough is enough and your body tells you no more and your mind concurs. It is not failure, and you are not giving up. It is acceptance, and time to do something else. When you have been pushed out of a perfectly good airplane and your parachute is a streamer that won't open and there isn't anything you can do, it may be a better choice to enjoy the time you have left, and the view.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor, and never ever give up.
At a presentation I was giving to a cancer support group I was asked the question: "How do you know when it's time to stop?" The person who asked the question, informed me they had been battling cancer off and on for over 11 years now because it came back 3 times. I asked if it came back again would they be willing to battle it again? They responded, "at this time, yes".
I don't know the right answer to this question. My treatment lasted for 3 months, 5 days a week for 4-5 hours in an infusion chair every 4 weeks for 2 months; another month of carrying an infusion pack 5 days a week with 24 hour infusion and 25 days of radiation; recovery for 6 weeks; surgery; recovery from surgery; and 6 more rounds of 5 days a week 4-5 hours a day every 4 weeks for 6 months. That was my treatment protocol. I haven't been faced with the decision to make about when it is time to stop. I know when I completed my 6th round of treatment, I wasn't in any condition to be able to continue treatment if needed. My body told me it had enough. Although, after the 4th round of the 6 round regimen of treatment, I was asked by my oncologist if I was able to continue treatment. My body wasn't telling me it needed a rest or that it couldn't continue. My response was "I will tell you when to stop". It took me 18 months after treatment before I could say I felt good again. During the 18 months of recovering, I was asked if I would go through treatment again if it came back. I responded, I didn't feel like I wanted to but yes, I would go through treatment again.
Every cancer patient decides how they will conduct their personal battle with cancer. I believe if you listen to your body, your body will tell you when it's time to stop. This is the time when the mind, which may be willing, needs to yield to the body. Regardless of your personal strength, stamina and courage, there may come the time when enough is enough and your body tells you no more and your mind concurs. It is not failure, and you are not giving up. It is acceptance, and time to do something else. When you have been pushed out of a perfectly good airplane and your parachute is a streamer that won't open and there isn't anything you can do, it may be a better choice to enjoy the time you have left, and the view.
Stay strong, keep your sense of humor, and never ever give up.
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
The Caregivers Journey
Good Morning Cancer Patients and Caregivers;
I recently provided a session with a cancer support group that had more cancer caregivers in the group than cancer patients. The caregivers were spouses, children, grandchildren, relatives and friends. During the sessions, I always have a segment devoted to the caregiver. Having been a cancer patient and not a caregiver, this segment about the caregiver is from an observation point of view and not from the actual experience of being a caregiver. Only the caregiver knows and understands the journey of the caregiver on the cancer patient's treatment journey.
As a result of the discussions and questions regarding care giving of the cancer patient, several observations about the caregiver's journey are worth the attention of the cancer patient;
1. The caregiver's life is disrupted equally as much by the diagnoses of cancer.
2. The caregiver had a life B4 becoming the caregiver and the new routine is now consuming that time.
3. The stress and agony of cancer is equally hard on the caregiver.
4. A sense of guilt is felt when the caregiver now does things they did B4 the cancer diagnosis, and the
cancer patient cannot participate.
5. Fear of the future and maintaining a sense of security through the journey creates added stress.
6. The roles and responsibilities of being a caregiver are not defined for the caregiver and the cancer patient.
7. The caregiver gives up the time they use to have for themself as it is being consumed by care giving.
8. The caregiver suffers in silence.
Surviving cancer is equally as stressful for the caregiver as it is for the cancer patient. The pain for the caregiver is more emotional than physical pain. If not recognized and attended to, the stress may begin to affect the caregivers own health. If the caregiver goes down, the cancer patient is going to be in big trouble.
The cancer patient and caregiver must work together to:
Stay healthy, keep your sense of humor and never give up.
I recently provided a session with a cancer support group that had more cancer caregivers in the group than cancer patients. The caregivers were spouses, children, grandchildren, relatives and friends. During the sessions, I always have a segment devoted to the caregiver. Having been a cancer patient and not a caregiver, this segment about the caregiver is from an observation point of view and not from the actual experience of being a caregiver. Only the caregiver knows and understands the journey of the caregiver on the cancer patient's treatment journey.
As a result of the discussions and questions regarding care giving of the cancer patient, several observations about the caregiver's journey are worth the attention of the cancer patient;
1. The caregiver's life is disrupted equally as much by the diagnoses of cancer.
2. The caregiver had a life B4 becoming the caregiver and the new routine is now consuming that time.
3. The stress and agony of cancer is equally hard on the caregiver.
4. A sense of guilt is felt when the caregiver now does things they did B4 the cancer diagnosis, and the
cancer patient cannot participate.
5. Fear of the future and maintaining a sense of security through the journey creates added stress.
6. The roles and responsibilities of being a caregiver are not defined for the caregiver and the cancer patient.
7. The caregiver gives up the time they use to have for themself as it is being consumed by care giving.
8. The caregiver suffers in silence.
Surviving cancer is equally as stressful for the caregiver as it is for the cancer patient. The pain for the caregiver is more emotional than physical pain. If not recognized and attended to, the stress may begin to affect the caregivers own health. If the caregiver goes down, the cancer patient is going to be in big trouble.
The cancer patient and caregiver must work together to:
- Define the role of the caregiver for the journey
- The caregiver needs to maintain their life by managing the stress, staying healthy and making time for themself
- The caregiver can't become a martyr, they should be patient with the cancer patient, push the patient when they need to be pushed, don't be mistreated, and don't turn away any help that is offered to you.
Stay healthy, keep your sense of humor and never give up.
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